SEVENTH SON

‘Seventh Son’ is boring. This is the impression likely to strike you 20 minutes into the film when you realise that you know exactly where this is going, because, well, you’ve seen it all before. And then you stop and think, “Huh. Interesting.” You’re not hating on the film because it’s stupid, had terrible CGI, unappealing actors, ridiculous characters, bad designs, shoddy dialogue or a lack of promised action. In fact, it’s the opposite - you’re just bored. ‘Seventh Son’ straddles the lines between good, bad and so-bad-that-its-good, never quite committing to either while sitting in limbo, a boring limbo... with Oscar winners and that guy from ‘Game of Thrones’.

Master Gregory (Jeff Bridges) is the last of an ancient group of men, the seventh sons of seventh sons, called Spooks. They’re entrusted with controlling the dark world and protecting the people from its members that mean them harm. The worst offender is Mother Malkin (Julianna Moore), the Queen of the dark who is out to destroy the world. After offing Gregory’s latest apprentice, he goes in search of another and finds Tom (Ben Barnes). Gregory has just one week to train him before the big showdown, but things get complicated when Tom finds himself falling in love with the enemy, a witch called Alice (Alicia Vikander).