EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING

TEEN ROMANCE TO PUT YOU TO SLEEP

THEATRICAL REVIEW
By Jess Fenton
20th August 2017

Movies don’t always have to be plot-driven; they are on occasion what we cinema-types refer to as “character-driven”. These are usually the films that dominate the nominees lists at awards ceremonies, and the ones ‘Fast and Furious’ fans have never even heard of. That might sound elitist, but it’s true - for the most part. Then every now and then, a picture comes along that defies both. Today it’s called ‘Everything, Everything’.

The following is a synopsis of the film: Maddy (Amandla Stenberg, ‘The Hunger Games’) is a 17-year-old girl who lives in the confines of her home due to a rare immune disorder. She mets and starts a tentative romance with Olly (Nick Robinson, ‘Jurassic World’) the boy next door. The end. I bet you’re screaming, “Take my money!!” - right?

SWITCH: 'EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING' TRAILER

This is of course the latest adaptation of a Young Adult book, because what overwrought teen romance drama isn’t these days? If the book is even remotely as boring as the film (which is only 96 minutes) then I have no idea how those teens were able to keep turning them pages - they have shorter attention spans than me!

Nothing happens in this movie. Actually nothing. And what little something does happen is so utterly predictable that it doesn’t feel like something, it’s just what should be. The first 15 minutes are pure exposition. Maddy narrates taking us through the few people and activities that make up her day. Kinda like that scene in ‘Tangled’ only Disney turned it into a peppy and memorable song instead of making seem as droll as it actually is.

Nothing happens in this movie. Actually nothing.

Even the romance story is boring. He likes her and doesn’t hide it. She likes him and doesn’t hide it. Urgh! Where’s the coyness!? The push-pull of new love!? I’ve found it more entertaining writing this review than actually watching ‘Everything, Everything’. In the immortal words of Simon Cowell: “That’s a no from me.”

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